Receiving

I love to receive gifts.  It's actually one of my love languages - along with words of affirmation so hit me up in the comments ;).  The problem is, I'm not that great at receiving gifts.  I'm great at receiving gifts on holidays and my birthday.  I suck at receiving them any other time. 

I also derive a great deal of joy from giving gifts. I really love giving gifts when people aren't expecting it. 

By sucking at receiving unexpected gifts I am depriving people of the very joy I love to experience. 

In recent weeks, our family has been on the receiving end of some very generous gifts.  And I really had a hard time accepting them. Don't get me wrong, I was super appreciative of the gifts.  I feel very blessed to be loved by the people who bought the gifts. 

One of the gifts was a big need. Like an 'Oh no! What are we going to do?' need.  I have no idea how our family would have met that need without the gift.  It was so hard to accept because I felt less like a grown up, kinda like a failure.  That I should have somehow been able to predict and plan for it.  I discussed it with the giver who quickly reassured me that they didn't see me that way. 

Yesterday I wrote about feeling like a grown up.  Talking about accepting that gift made me feel a little less grown up.  The discussion with a giver helped me see that I had a warped sense of what a grown up is. 

Slowly but surely, I'm changing my definition of a grown up.  A grown up is someone who gives and receives help with grace.  A grown up realizes that God cares for us through other people.  A grown up appreciates God's provision so they joyfully accept the help of others.