Thursday, March 2, 2017

Asking the Right Questions

God is teaching me lots of things as the mom of these three boys, especially my teenagers.  Over the past few weeks, He taught me the importance of asking the right questions.

This is a lesson God and I have been working on for a while.  When the Bigs were smaller I learned that asking one question could clarify all kinds of situations.
What happened right before that?
"Mom! He hit me with his shoe"
"What happened right before that?"
"I threw my shoe at him."

See? Now I know everyone is guilty, not just the one being tattled on.

Last weekend, Zac went to his first school dance.  He and his buddies were not that into it.  They actually didn't want to go at first.  Contrast this to Sam's group who started planning their outfits as soon as the dance was announced.

When they finally decided that they would go to the dance, I asked Zac what he wanted to wear.

"Khakis and a pullover."

A pullover to Zac is a quarter zip Under Armor sweatshirt.  Nope, try again.  How about one of the button downs your grandma bought you?  OK, he'd agree to that.

I found out from my mom friends that their boys were going to wear jeans.

"Zac, do you want to wear jeans?"

"My jeans don't fit."

"We can go get a new pair of jeans."

"No, I don't want to go shopping. I'll wear my khakis."

Fast forward to the day of the dance.  30 minutes before he's supposed to leave the house Prince Charming decides to get ready.

"Give me your khakis so I can iron them."

He hands me khaki shorts.  Khaki cargo shorts.  Khaki cargo shorts from 2 summers ago.

"Buddy, you handed me shorts. Where are your khaki pants?"

"My khaki pants don't fit.  I'm wearing those."

"Ummm, no you're not.  You are not wearing shorts to this dance!"

Frantic search for pants that fit ensues.  Thankfully, his daddy found his nice grey pants and off he went.  But I'm telling you it never occurred to me to ask him "What does khakis mean? Shorts or pants?"

This is just the least embarrassing incident! What is it about boys that makes them answer in the shortest, least detailed way?  I don't get it!  But, I'm learning to ask better follow up questions.


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