Thursday, February 8, 2018

White Lies

A new addition to B-man's vocabulary is 'white lie'.  He says it's a lie that doesn't hurt anyone. 

B is a truth teller. Don't ask him a question you don't want an honest answer to.  Don't ask him what he thinks of your new hair cut or your new outfit if you aren't prepared.   A couple of years ago, he spent the night with his aunt.  While they were making breakfast, he said "OK, I'll tell you! I ate the rest of the cookies before you got up!"

So, these white lies are very out of character for him.  But, here's the thing...he can't hold them.  He'll tell you everything is fine but by bed time he'll spill his guts about everything that happened. 

I always ask him if he has homework on our way home from school.  The other day, he told me he did not have any homework.  Then, later in evening he told me that his homework answer had been a white lie but that it was ok because he could do it later.  No way, dude, you've got to do it now.

Last week he told me he had disobeyed me three weeks ago.  I think he kept it in this long because I didn't suspect he'd done anything wrong and hadn't asked him about it.  It led to a good conversation about guilt and truth and trust. I told him that guilt is that feeling in his tummy that reminds him that what he did was wrong.  Ryan's told him that when you don't tell the truth, we can't trust him because we don't know what to believe.  We'll be guessing if what he is saying is true. 

I think this really hit home with him.  We'll see...he is still a 9 year old boy. 

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