Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Sam - 18

I can not believe today is here.  Today my oldest is 18.  I grew a man.  I can not believe it.  Part of my disbelief stems from the disbelief that I am over 18 myself.  I can not believe that God has allowed me to be a mom and guided me (and Ryan) in this for 18 years. 

Wasn't it just yesterday that I was being handed a 7 pound 14 ounce brown haired baby? I was so taken aback, I thought he'd have red hair.  My Daddy passed away the February before Sam was born, my Daddy had red hair.  Every night of my last trimester I had the same dream: my Daddy standing on our front porch holding a red headed baby.  He hands me the baby, says "It's about time" and disappears.  So you understand my shock that Samuel Paul did not have red hair.  Once I recovered from my shock, I realized how absolutely perfect he was.

It's hard to express how proud I am of Sam.  He's really come into his own this year.  Sam has dyslexia and we diagnosed it pretty late - 6th grade.  He had to realize that needing help wasn't a weakness but a necessity.  Once he got his mind wrapped around that, about the 2nd semester of 9th grade, he started advocating for himself.  He asks teachers about his accommodations at the beginning of the year and makes sure he gets them.  This year he's taken a dual credit History class.  And he is rocking it!  It's like he's figured out how he learns and is taking the steps to be successful. 

He gets himself up every morning, gets his little brother up, and gets them both to school super early for athletics.  Do you know how nice it is to not have to mess with that in the morning? It's such a gift.  I don't have to hassle anyone in the morning, I get to do my own thing.  I'm so thankful. 

At one game this past football season, it was raining and Sam was struggling to snap the football well.  It was so painful.  I don't really relax until the first snap of the game. This game had my stomach in knots.  I don't know what he did or what anyone said to him at halftime but he pulled it together during the second half.  I was so proud of how he was able to pull out the nosedive. 

The best thing about Sambo is how gentle he is.  He still gives me the best hugs.  When he started playing football as a little boy, he didn't want to hurt anyone.  Ryan and his uncle Ronnie had to work hard to get him tough for games. Ronnie would have to make him mad, almost make him cry.  I knew that if Sam growled in those younger years, the other team better watch out.  He was coming for you.

In general, it's been such a joy to see Sam mature and come into his own this past year.  I love him so much. I am so glad we had him start school late.  I'm not ready for him to go off to college. I'm so glad I have another year with him in our house full time.  But mostly, I'm excited to see what God has in store for him and I am proud to be his momma!

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