Thursday, May 17, 2018

Raising Husbands

Last weekend I got my feelers hurt by The Bigs.  Words of affirmation is one of my top 3 love languages - actually quality time, receiving gifts and words of affirmation are all tied for number 1.  Anyway, they missed an opportunity for some words of affirmation last weekend and it upset me. 

Because I'm a 21st century mom, and it's uncomfortable to cry in front of them, I texted each of them separately to discuss how they'd hurt my feeling.  They were, of course, very sorry and had not intended to hurt my feelings. Both conversations were very productive. 

At first I wasn't going to tell them they hurt my feelings but I rethought it.  There are things they are old enough to take care of - holidays are one of them.  They don't need money for gifts. They need a piece of paper, a pen and 5 minutes. 

I have often said that our job is not to raise happy kids.  Our job is to raise good adults.  Adults that have a relationship with God and know how to treat people.  A friend reminded me this week that I'm also raising husbands. 

When I teach my boys how to treat me, I teach them to how to treat their future wives.  Since I've been praying for these way in the future women,  it's only fitting that I prep these boys for them fully.  They know about being respectful.  They know how to clean, although they don't often practice that skill.  They can both cook quite well. 

And now it's time to work on noticing.  Noticing what's important to the people you love and taking action on those things. Noticing what day it is and if that day is important to someone you love.  Noticing how to brighten someone's day.  Noticing when the trash is full and should be emptied (a girl can dream). 

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